Children of Haiti - Restaveks

Hello – I work for a small non-profit based in Redmond, WA, with members nationwide. I am a citizen of Washington state, and so am sending this email to you, as is appropriate. This is a message, however, that needs to be heard everywhere. It does not originate with me, I’m not the first person to share this message: the message is about slavery.

Right now citizens of the United States and other nations are working around the clock to save Haitians. When we have found, fed, or memorialized every Haitian, there will still be a monumental task ahead of us – turning Haiti into a country that can support itself and thrive. Roads, homes, hospitals, schools, community centers and more are all needed before there can be any expectation that Haitians are on the road to recovery from this profoundly traumatic event, and from years of grinding poverty and violence.

That cannot truly happen while there is an acceptance in Haiti (or with those who have a diplomatic relationship with Haiti) of what is, effectively, slavery. Whatever word applied, children bound to servitude is slavery, and I cannot articulate how distressing their situation is to me, as a person who is free and who is a parent.

At this time,
· There approximately 300,000 restaveks in Haiti
· Only 11% of restaveks receive an education
· Most restaveks are females between 5-15 years of age

There is no mention of rights, oversight, or community expectations dictating treatment of these indentured children. They are typically malnourished, overworked, and neglected emotionally.

This is unnecessary and unacceptable. This pivotal time must function as a catalyst for change, and one essential change is an end to the practice of indenturing children. They are human children. They should know love, affection, and security, whether in an environment of poverty or not. It is not about relative wealth, it is about allowing them to be children.

In this country, and likely elsewhere in the world, there are many adults who want nothing more than to invite children into their homes, and to care for them in constructive and healthy environments. I have heard again and again how difficult it is to adopt children from Haiti, despite the desperate need felt by these children.

As Senators, you have considerably influence. As US citizens, we have considerable privilege. As people who are free, we have considerable obligation to value the freedom of others.

Honestly, I’m very upset. I’m writing this as a mom, as a person who sees an excess of suffering where none is needed, and who values freedom and family above all else.

What do I want to happen? I want the practice of indenturing children to be illegal in Haiti. I want those who currently ‘own’ restaveks to be rewarded financially for turning them over, and to be sentenced to community service if they attempt to refuse. I want those children to be made available for adoption within a system modeled on the Mockingbird Family Model, so that there would be support for the transplanted children and the adoptive parents. I want the whole thing to be organized and implemented by a multi-national committee under whatever international agency you’d like.

There is a lot of misery in the world, but there is typically a lot of parental love as well. There is no parental love for these children. There are many who advocate for them, but Haiti is an island far away, and their voices haven’t been sufficiently heard. We can hear them now, and we must listen and take action.

What action do you intend to take? I hope to hear your answer very soon.

Resources:
The Restavek Foundation: http://www.restavekfreedom.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=cms.home
I too am Haiti: http://www.itooamhaiti.org/
Pan America’s report on children in Haiti: http://www.itooamhaiti.org/ht/a/GetDocumentAction/i/13583
Mockingbird Society, Mockingbird Family Model: http://www.mockingbirdsociety.org/the-mockingbird-family-model/

Thank you for the work you do in representing the people of Washington.

Bethan Tuttle
Executive Director
Community Watch
http://www.communitywatch.us/

Think your child is being abused?

It's not enough to know that your child is being abused - you need to take steps to make sure the 'evidence' is credible and gets to the right group of people.

1. Keep a notebook of dates, times, and instances that warranted concern. Start at the first occurance of something that seemed wrong or inappropriate, and note down everything from that point forward. If there seems to be a correlation between phone calls, unaccompanied visits, or play dates, make a note of those too.
2. Be as factual and non-accusatory as possible. Your job is to advocate for your child, and it is important to convey facts, not emotion and angst.
3. If you believe that a crime has been committed against your child, it is your right and your obligation to seek assistance from the police. Do them a favor and provide as much information as possible, which is why your notebook and your factual communication are so important. If you have reports from your child's counselor or pediatrician, take that along as well.
4. Make sure your child knows -
• That you love them no matter what, always & forever
• That they won't get in trouble for something an adult or older kid does
• That they have the right to feel safe, to have their private areas left alone, and to ask for help
5. Share stories with your child about events that happened to you that made you feel ashamed, scared, vulnerable, and alone, and talk about how you received help.
6. If there is a related divorce taking place, acquire the services of a Guardian ad litem, or similar, to be the voice of your child in court.

You can learn more at CommunityWatch.us. Good luck to you and your child/ren.

What are these people thinking? Really?

Roman Polanski did something terrible to a child in the 70s and then he ran away from his agreed-upon consequence. I'm not French, I'm not Swiss, so I can't speak to what they were thinking to not extradite him until now.

I don't know what people are thinking when they shake Roman Polanski's hand or say that his achievements and contributions to 'art' should weigh against his crime. When they applauded his Oscar win at the Academy Awards. Of course, he couldn't accept it in person because he can't come to the US without going to prison for sexually assaulting a child.

He makes good movies. Whoopi Goldberg is not pleased that he may go to jail, apparently. I'm not an actor, and I'm sure as hell not Whoopi Goldberg, so I have no idea what she's thinking.

I don't know what sexual assault survivors are thinking when they see that happen, either. They likely also don't understand what is essentially inexplicable - applaud a guy who plied a 13 year old with drugs and alcohol and then had sex with her. This guy (Polanski) did it, and all those important/famous people know it, and are applauding him anyway. How does that work?

I don't care how old he is, I don't care how good his movies are. What do I know? He sexually assaulted a kid - I wouldn't shake his hand, I won't watch his movies, I don't think his contributions to art or anything could outweigh his crime. Justice doesn't work that way. I want him in jail.

/bethan rant

Foster Care Alumni of America

This morning I opened up outlook and was pleased to see an evite - I'm a social girl, I like parties.

This is an incredibly cool party. Maybe one of the coolest parties ever. The evite was from FCAA - the Foster Care Alumni of America, for their first Reunion.

I'm going, and I'm taking my family.

What makes a family? What makes a community? Shared experience, support, and the will to work together through the conflicts and joys of life.

When something is broken, you work to fix it. When you do not have what you need, you work to get it. When you believe something, you do it. That is what the FCAA is doing, and I am so pleased and impressed.

ADHD or Trauma?

Diagnosis: ADHD—or Is It Trauma?
"Though we tend to think of traumatic experiences as rare, in fact, by age 16, seven of 10 children have been exposed to at least one potentially traumatic event—such as a natural disaster, severe car accident, child abuse or the loss of close family member—according to a study of a representative sample of more than 1,400 children living in North Carolina published in 2007."

This article discusses the symptoms of trauma and how they are similar to ADHD or ADD, and so are often mistaken by pediatricians who don't have sufficient training, or who haven't received the information they need to do a proper screening for the REAL cause of the behavioral issues.

This is an area where the parents and care-givers need to be observant and stay attuned to their children: if you see a change in how your child behaves, such as nervousness, a strong startle response, increased aggressive behavior which seems out of character - then you need to look around at the people and circumstances of your child's environment and see if you can find some clues, and you need to get your kid screened by a professional. There are a lot of great child psychologists out there, and a lot of insurance companies cover a certain number of visits per year, especially when you have behavioral disruptions. Many of these psychologists and counselors are available through school districts.

Remember, younger kids have 'magical thinking'. If abuse starts before the kids are more logical thinkers, then they probably assume that you know about it, or that you can pick up on the tiny little clues that they drop, which are often disguised as erratic behavior.

Talk to your kids, follow up on random statements, and don't let erratic or unusual behavior go un-discussed and dealt with.